Oxford Hawks Men’s 4’s vs Leighton Buzzard 1s – 05.10.24

The mighty Hawks 4 travelled to Leighton Buzzard hoping to get back to winning ways after a draw last week. The team were shocked by the appearance of the sun in the sky on entering the local microclimate that is Leighton Buzzard, we had always assumed it was like Narnia and was ruled by a wicked witch, forever holding the area in an eternal winter but never letting it be Christmas…since normally when we arrive it is cold and snowing even in the summer! The only downside of this surprise in weather was that with the sun in the sky and the pitch more akin to a slow docile beach, we assumed that this was a vacation….the wicked witch might finally have been defeated in Naria/Leighton, meaning Christmas had finally been allowed to arrive, but the only presents on offer were not from Santa but from Hawks giving the ball away to Buzzard constantly in the first 20mins. With Captain fantastic missing this week the team was led by deputy Oakes, who gave a speech about getting used to the slow pitch and giving 100% passes, but unfortunately he was unable to do this himself. 20mins in and Hawks were 2-0 down and making life very easy for Leighton. The passing performance after that was much better, but with team now able to pass we decided to gift the advantage back to Leighton by playing mostly with 10 players. Bertie Cook was first with a green card after sending a small child flying with his weapon and was walking off the pitch before the umpire even started putting his hand in his pocket. Shortly after Bertie returned to the fold, Josh was greened just before the stroke of half time. Leighton were definitely making the most of there numerical advantage and with more subs than Hawks they were definitely looking fresher.

The second half continued in the same manor and soon after we returned to 11 players Bertie was green carded again for viciously barging over another small child. Lammy did his best to slow down the game by spending about 10minutes giving friendly advice to the umpire about some of the finer rules of hockey. However, Leighton capitalised on the numerical advantage and soon won a flick after a Hawks foot on the goal line. Hawks did start to get more into the game and were penetrating the Leighton D but the game was pretty disjointed at the time, with the opposition happy to sit on their lead and rotate their subs to keep the team fresh. Bertie soon received his hattrick of cards after using his derrière to send a 3rd young child flying like he was bouncing off a trampoline. A small victory as that was our last card of the game However, Luke had had enough by this stage and had decided to end his match early and headed off for a more enjoyable afternoon at work. With 11 players on the pitch Hawks were pressing for goals and won a short corner, Bertie (never a man to stay out of the limelight) sending the ball at pace across for Phil to defect past the keeper – well done Phil for not using your feet. Unfortunately, that was the end of the highlights for Hawks. The last play of the game and Leighton shot at goal and Holder chose not to move his foot out of the way while stood on the goal line. A second flick was awarded, which George nearly saved off his chest, but the ball crept over the line.

The game was a disappointment but after the match we enjoyed Phil inexplicable teaching George self-defence on the side of the pitch and a hearty meal of sausage, chips and beans. Back to the pure shores of BRN next week after 2 away games on the trot, please don’t “take me to your Beach” again Leighton.

MOM – Jamie for tireless effort and enterprise while in midfield

DOD – SOMEHOW it was not Bertie Cook for his 3 cards, but it went to Captain Oakes for confusing the slower members of the teams at the start by shouting “on 3……3,2,1 HAWKs”.